Hell in a Bucket
What I haven't realized until just now was that I have lots of money suddenly again. The danger of course with lots of money is that you get silly spending it. One must be always vigilant about such things...it doesn't take long to getting used to money and the things it affords, and then soon you're in above your head buying all the gizmos you think you need just to exist.
Given that whatever percentage of the world populace doesn't even have running water to poo in, let alone drink, it makes one think twice about how to spend money. Alas, I still buy useless stuff with it--bags of chips, beer, crap like that. Besides my rent (60,000 Yen = $493 US), transportation on public vehicles is my next biggest expense (they give me 30,000 a month, but it really costs me 34,000 a month to go to and from work).
Next would be food and house stuff. And then the telephone (about 4,000 a month). I am not going to invest any money in other stuff but the basics for my place. In a very short time, I should have several thousands of dollars to do something "useful" with.
At a very young age I sort of thought about what was the point of scrimping and saving for old age when you could be enjoying life now. I think my thoughts of enjoying youth as it was was the influence of Herman Hesse's Steppenwolf and Siddartha. Then a real life experience solidified it when I worked as a Japanese gardener one summer--the crew went to do some Japanese garden at this huge, brand-new mansion in north Toronto. The house was gigantic. Inside was this nice older lady and her husband. They were so happy to see us. The lady would bring out lemonade and would talk to us all day. She had a family and they had all grown up and moved away. The house they bought was her and her husband's dream from when they first got married--I guess everyone then dreamt of a dream home to raise the kids in. They finally got the dream home, but really had no one to enjoy it with. No kids, just old neighbors living beside them. It seemed to me they were bored to tears living there.
I got this flash of insight then that it doesn't make a whole lot of sense to waste your life saving and hoping for something, because eventually it may come, but it might not actually be what you want at that time. It's all a matter of timing.
The insanity of working here is sort of interesting to watch. It's doing nothing for my health, however. It's getting too cold to go ride my bike (which is what I loved doing in Stittsville through the farm fields and forests) so I guess I need to find some way to keep exercising. In terms of the job...well, there might be three students out of the lot I teach that are interesting. All have been abroad, all have a purpose for why they are studying, and all are the head of their various clubs--you know how Japan works--this club thing is more important than anything else. Being the social big wig is more important than what grade you get. Hmm. Something in that rings true,
doesn't it?
The shitty thing here is the same thing that was shitty about my previous Japan experience--the student polls. Students fill in a survey of your teaching, and it counts a great deal--promotions are based on it, as well as salary cuts and the possibility of getting fired (a guy was just fired in mid-semester here because the students
didn't "like" him).
All these teachers are all freaked out, ensuring they score high on the polls by not giving any homework, keeping everything in the comfort zone for the students, which amounts to a class similar to Romper Room--those that wanna play can play, and those that need a little nappie can sleep if they want. As long as the kids are smiling is all that counts.
Meanwhile the dean, poor devil--flaking away with psoriasis-- has put all his credibility on TOEIC test score improvement. There is just no way any pressure he puts on teachers or students to improve the TOEIC scores will work. Ha!
He keeps on telling the staff to buck up and get the scores higher. Me? Well, I'll do whatever it takes not to teach TOEIC (I am not just some anti-establishment yahoo here--I did a lot of work with language testing--recall--and it just doesn't make sense to run programs to teach to this test).
What amazes me is that Ph.D's in Japan (and elsewhere?) get the juicy jobs, and it doesn't really matter if they know how to teach or even have to come from an applied linguistic background. It's just the title that impresses hiring practice (well, the same holds true for politics...how can a cowboy be prez of the USA? How can a kid from Shawinagan run Canada?)
More vexing are the British cronies that keep on pushing for the TOEIC. What's with the Brits? I guess it keeps their white, hairy, ugly asses above contempt by pointing at test results and diverting attention away from their own lack of skill.
I think it's reached critical mass here. If scores don't improve come this December's forced round of TOEIC testing (the last round was Oct. 23--what possible increase can be expected?)
Who knows? What then will follow? There are a lot of people that eye a job where you make 18 million yen a year ($160,000 US). But always the wrong ones. These are the guys that like politics and bullshit. Most dedicated teachers steer clear from these positions because they'd rather teach than put up with the crap. So you end up with constipated ladies or poo-eyed slovenly drunken Brits in these positions.
Me?
God, I may be going to hell in a bucket, but at least I'm enjoying the ride.
Another couple of paychecks and I'm outta here.
Gaga | 8:43 PM
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